Part 5 — Lila

The weeks that followed were the most destabilizing of my life.

Madame A no longer gave me any respite. Every evening, I had to read my contract out loud, plug in my ass, before I could go to sleep.

One evening, she ordered me to go buy sanitary pads and tampons and leave them clearly visible in the bathroom.

Another evening, she asked me to wear my pink nail polish without putting a clear coat over it. I had to go to work like that.

The real turning point came on a Friday evening. Madame A wrote to me: "This weekend, you will go out dressed as a girl. Not just a skirt and hoodie. Make an effort."

I put on a black midi skirt, black tights, a fitted gray top, and did proper makeup. I wore the plug and the cage.

When I looked at myself in the mirror before leaving, I had a shock. I no longer looked like a guy in a skirt. I looked like a girl.

I spent over an hour and a half in a shopping mall. I walked through the aisles. I pretended to look at clothes. Several times, men looked at me.

Every twenty minutes, I went to the bathroom and sent a photo to Madame A.

At one point, she replied: "Go to the women's bathroom. Close the door. Get on your knees. Take a photo of yourself kneeling in front of the toilet."

I hesitated for almost five minutes. Then I obeyed. I took the photo kneeling on the cold tiles of a public bathroom.

Madame A made me stay on my knees for another five minutes, touching my hole through the thong while whispering humiliating phrases.

That evening, she sent me a long message: "You are starting to truly understand what it means to be a thing. From now on, I will give you stricter rules. You will have to ask my permission for many things."

I read this message several times. Then I got back on my knees, opened my phone's camera, and started speaking.

"Hello Mistress… My name is Lila. I am wearing your pink cage. I am wearing your plug. I am locked. I am denied. I belong to you. I am starting to like this."

I sent the video. She replied an hour later: "Good, Lila. You are really starting to understand. What comes next will be more difficult. More perverse. More unavowable. But you are ready."

I stayed on my knees for a long time after reading this message. The reflection in the mirror no longer scared me. It made me hard. Or at least, it tried to.

I was no longer Lucas. I was Lila. And Lila belonged to Madame A.